Tag: the Church

In asking this question I’m not referring to the denomination or style of the church you’re part of (or not part of).  Over my 30 years as a pastor, I’ve observed many “kinds” of people who refer to themselves as “Christian.” I’ve noticed some particular trends in the past few years, some of which seem to be especially unhealthy and not accurately reflecting the church Jesus said He would build.  So, what kind of Christian are YOU?

1. The Convenience Christian treats the church, and their spirituality, like the local convenience store. They know it’s there whenever they need something. They’ll just pop in from time to time when it’s, umm, convenient.  This is the lifestyle Christian who fits God and faith around the more important things of life like sport, time for themselves and catching up with friends.

2. The Consumer Christian attends a church for what they can get out of it, and they will continue to attend (when it’s convenient) for as long as you are able to meet their needs.  They want everything to be just right – the right music, the right songs – at the right volume, the right teaching (as long as it’s entertaining) and the right programs for their kids.  Don’t ask the consumer Christian to do anything; they’re not at church for that. Other people do the things!  You have the consumer Christian’s loyalty as long as you continue to do the right thing and as long as a church doesn’t start up nearby who can do things more right than you.  The consumer Christian is also willing to travel some distance to get what they want.  They are very committed to their needs being met.

3. The Crisis Christian is often a convenience Christian too.  They’re the ones you only see when they have an emergency.  They’re quite happy when all is well. God is kind of “there” and they know the church will always be there too, but it’s only when something goes wrong that God and church seem important.  Their prayer life will spring to life and God is entreated to get them out of the problem and to end the pain.  They come back to church as a bargaining chip with God.  They believe in the doctrine of Quid pro quo – offering prayers to God as a trade: “God, if you get me out of this then I will … (fill in the blank here).”  This is not Christianity at all.  In fact, this kind of thinking can be traced back to the idolatry and religious festivals of ancient Rome (Quid pro quo is a Latin term meaning “something for something”).

4. The Crowd Christian just loves to be amongst the multitude.  The bigger the church the better! They often want to be anonymous (which is okay for a while but not long-term).  The crowd is often made up of convenience, consumer and crisis Christians.  This is leading to a modern phenomenon of large churches having more people who attend less often.  It’s easy to build a crowd as long as you have the best of everything.  The crowd will come for an event like a guest speaker, or a band or food.  Just ask Jesus who had a crowd of 5000 men plus women and children when there were miracles and food flowing but only had 120 people at a 9am prayer meeting.

5 The Conspiracy Christian. knows that there’s lots of dark stuff happening in the world and feels called of God to make sure we all know about it.  Some of the conspiracy theories perpetrated by conspiracy Christians over the years include:

  • Obama is the Antichrist and plans to rule America by sharia law
  • Charles Darwin took it all back the day he died
  • The Birth control pill turns your uterus into a grave littered with teeny-weeny corpses of fully formed babies
  • The Bible is really an ancient computer program
  • Jesus invented the Internet
  • Noah came from Mars
  • The Garden of Eden is hidden under Kansas City
  • The government is setting up concentration camps throughout the U.S. to intern Christians
  • Each year, 1 million children are kidnapped and murdered by satanic cults
  • Gay men wear special rings for the sole purpose of giving innocent straight people HIV.
  • The abortion-mad Chinese eat human foetuses.

Now, I don’t doubt for one minute that there are things happening in this world that we don’t know about. There is a dark side to this, but Christians need to stop fixating on the Illuminati and start focusing on Jesus and the Kingdom of God.

6. The Condemning Christian is much like the conspiracy Christian but his “ministry” is to guard the truth and expose and criticise anyone who deviates in the slightest way.  These people seem to have a massive amount of discretionary time to read and respond to blogs and Facebook posts. They like to disagree and argue and it doesn’t matter what you say they will always come back with why you’re wrong. They are cowards behind keyboards – usually faceless, often nameless.  There are whole ministries set up for the express purpose of keeping pastors, churches & other ministries “accountable.”  They are self-appointed guardians of the truth and they are unrelenting and brutal.  Theirs is the ministry of condemnation. Condemning Christians are like the schoolyard bullies of the Internet and, just like the bullies, they crave attention.  They also exist in our churches. They’re the people for whom nothing is ever right and who have to pick the one statement in your sermon they disagree with and focus on that to the detriment of everything else you said. They strain out gnats and swallow camels.

7. The Community Christian is the person that reflects what Jesus came to build – His Church.  The English word “church” is translated from the Greek word Ekklesia that originally referred to a group of people who were called out from their homes (usually by a trumpet) and summoned to a public political meeting.  Jesus, Luke, Paul, James and John use this word 114 times to describe the community that would result from Jesus’ life, death & resurrection.  The church is not a building, not something you simply “attend,” not an event or a consumable commodity, not a convenience or a crowd to hide in.  The church is a community of believers in Jesus who gather on a regular basis in large and small groups to worship, pray, be instructed in God’s Word, eat together, help one another in practical and spiritual ways, build friendships and grow in grace, give and receive and reach out to a world that God loves and for whom Jesus died (see Acts 2:42-47). The New Testament speaks many times of believers gathering or meeting together as a community.  The writer to the Hebrew Christians was particularly strong on the importance of this gathering: “let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.”

Real community is life changing as reflected in this email I received from a guy in Bayside Church last week:

“Hi Rob.  Thanks for last Sunday it was absolutely amazing.  When you showed the video interview with the guy from Open Doors, and he spoke about the 12yr old girl who was persecuted by her father, I found it very difficult to comprehend.  What came next was even more powerful. You asked us to get into groups and pray for the persecuted church. I was in a group of 4 and I felt like I needed to start off but I burst into tears, overwhelmed by Gods presence and how that 12-year-old girl had been treated. I prayed, then the lady next to me started crying when she prayed and so did her husband, and the guy next to me was also in tears.  Then we worshipped God some more and that was amazing. And then we had a pray line so I headed straight out, still crying by the way.  I went down for the count and God was all over me. Awesome!  You know I woke up that morning and straight away I heard the Holy Spirit say ‘honour me.’  You see that day we had no kids so we were going to skip church and do something together. I went instead.”

So which one(s) of the above seven kinds of Christians best describes you?  Be honest and, if you’re not reflecting the qualities of the Community Christian then it’s time to make some changes: “The hour has already come for you to wake up from your slumber, because our salvation is nearer now than when we first believed.”  

 

ABOUT ROB BUCKINGHAM

Rob Buckingham is the founding pastor of Bayside Church, a thriving faith community located in the Bayside suburbs of Melbourne.  Welcoming people from all walks of life, Bayside Church invites all people to experience the Christian faith and God.  For more information about Bayside Church:

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Social media was buzzing earlier this week over Mark Driscoll and his impending appearance at this year’s Hillsong Conference.  This was on the back of some protests, a petition with 3000 signatures and media reports about a controversial blog in which Mark refers to women as “penis houses.”

There is no shortage of material that outlines in detail the sins of Mark Driscoll.  In his books and sermons he appears to just go too far in trying to be funky and relevant to a new generation in order to reach them for Jesus.  He swears, uses crude humour and he encourages the people he trains to brew their own beer at home.

In one of his books, The Radical Reformission, he has a chapter titled ‘The Sin of Light Beer’ in where he makes the case that light beer came about to please feminists, and that good Christians should oppose feminism by drinking ‘good beer’.  On another occasion he taught women who had unbelieving husbands, “You need to go home and tell your husband that you’ve met Jesus and you’ve been studying the Bible, and that you’re convicted of a terrible sin in your life. And then you need to drop his trousers, and you need to serve your husband.” 

Things started to go wrong back in 2007 when Mars Hill Church changed its bylaws that shifted leadership from 24 male elders to a much smaller group.  Mars Hill’s former Women’s ministry leader, Wendy Allsup says, “Mark gave power to a few men that he hand-picked rather than trusting the full council of elders that he felt was slowing him down.  Mark wanted to grow Mars Hill into a big tree, but in the process he chopped away the root system by dismissing those qualified leaders who were actually shepherding the church — because they raised legitimate questions.”

In 2008 the church cancelled everyone’s membership, saying one could only renew their membership if they said they had no problems with the elders.  At that point many people left the church.

Later it came to light that Mars Hill Church had paid a California-based marketing company at least $210,000 in 2011 and 2012 to ensure that Real Marriage, a book written by Mark Driscoll and his wife Grace, made the New York Times best-seller list.  In March 2014 Mark wrote the following apology to Mars Hill Church:

In August 2014, it was discovered that he wrote a blog-post patronising women in 2001 under a pseudonym.  His beliefs, written under the name William Wallace II, included the statements that have been highlighted by the media recently:

“The first thing to know about your penis is, that despite the way it may see, it is not your penis.  Ultimately, God created you and it is his penis. You are simply borrowing it for a while.  While His penis is on loan you must admit that it is sort of just hanging out there very lonely as if it needed a home, sort of like a man wondering (sic) the streets looking for a house to live in.  Knowing that His penis would need a home, God created a woman to be your wife and when you marry her and look down you will notice that your wife is shaped differently than you and makes a very nice home.”

Driscoll apologised and took a six-week leave of absence while the leadership of Mars Hill Church investigated the allegations being made against him.  The investigation revealed “patterns of persistent sin” by Senior Pastor Mark Driscoll, who was accused of bullying and intimidating behaviour in a complaint by 21 former church elders.  They accused him of creating a climate of fear through his verbally abusive language, lack of self-control and arrogant domineering attitude.  The church’s leadership tried to put a restoration process in place but Driscoll resigned in October 2014.

The response of the Mars Hill leaders was as follows: “Our intention was to do this while providing for his eventual restoration to leadership.  The Board of Elders in agreement with the Board of Overseers are grieved, deeply grieved, that any process like that was lost to us when Mark Driscoll resigned and left the church.”

So where to from here?

Firstly, the Christian church needs to take some responsibility for allowing the culture of churches like Mars Hill to flourish.  Over my 30 years as a pastor I’ve seen the fads come and go and I’ve watched some of God’s people come and go with them!  Wendy Allsup, put it this way, “Mars Hill was projected on to us as this new and exciting thing that God was doing, but God has been building his church for centuries.”  While I celebrate the things that the Spirit of God is doing through the church all around the world, we need to exercise discernment and we need to stop putting people on pedestals.  The only man that should ever be exalted is the Lord Jesus Christ. The rest of us would do well to live humbly.

Secondly, we need to be wary of any church that is a boys club and that doesn’t recognise the valuable contribution and gifts of women – including preaching, teaching and pastoral care.  For more on this subject please refer to my blog, “Women should be silent in the church?”

Thirdly, there is obviously a world of hurt still being experienced by many people as a result of Mark Driscoll’s leadership.  I’m am not privy to what has or has not been done or said to this point but I do know there are former Mars Hill Church elders and leaders who are open and willing to be reconciled with Mark.  No doubt there will need to be some honest conversations, lots of listening, empathy, compassion and forgiveness.  Much of the New Testament was written to respond to conflict of varying kinds.  There are some wonderful principles therein to help with the reconciliation process – and it is a process!

Finally, let’s not write Mark Driscoll off as a lost cause.  Yes he has made some very public and very serious mistakes but that doesn’t mean that the Christian church should alienate him for all time.  A casual reading of the Bible reveals how much God is interested in using faulty people – Moses was a murderer, David an adulterer, Peter was a hypocrite and Timothy was, for a season, timid and ashamed of the gospel and Paul.  Some in the Christian church may want to put Mark Driscoll on the scrap heap, but God doesn’t have one.

Consider these words that Paul wrote to the Galatian Church, “Dear brothers and sisters, if another believer is overcome by some sin, you who are godly should gently and humbly help that person back onto the right path. And be careful not to fall into the same temptation yourself. Share each other’s burdens, and in this way obey the law of Christ. If you think you are too important to help someone, you are only fooling yourself. You are not that important.”

The Bible teaches, “God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.”  Jesus will continue to build His church, the unstoppable Kingdom of God will continue to grow, and all the people who’ve been hurt – including Mark Driscoll – have a place in it!

There seems to be a lot of confusion amongst Christians as to the proper place for judging – or not judging. I was reading a Facebook thread on the weekend on Ireland’s vote for gay marriage, and especially U2’s Bono coming out in favour of it, so you can imagine all the strong opinions that were expressed.

Some people said things like “who are we to judge? Jesus told us not to judge” – quoting Matthew 7:1.  Others suggested that we are to judge and quoted 1 Corinthians 5:12, “What business is it of mine to judge those outside the church? Are you not to judge those inside?”

A Facebook friend today asked me this question: “If I disagree with someone on life choices … does that mean I’m being judgmental? If so – should I just roll over and agree with everything so I’m not being judgmental. When is a right time to disagree?”  It’s a great question and one I hope to answer here.

On the face of it the New Testament appears to contradict itself on the issue of judging but, when you dig a little deeper and consider context, there is no contradiction at all.

Many words have different meanings depending on the context.  For example, the word “tip” can mean, “end, rubbish dump, advice, gratuity and to spill.”  The word “up” has 30 definitions.  So it is with the word “judge.”

For example, in Matthew 7:1, “Do not judge, or you too will be judged,” Jesus uses the Greek word krino meaning “to condemn or punish.”  Whilst in Luke 12:57, He uses the same Greek word but here it means “to assess” – “Why don’t you judge for yourselves what is right?”

Paul uses the same word krino in 1 Corinthians 5:12, “What business is it of mine to judge those outside the church? Are you not to judge those inside?”  Here the word is used in the context of “assessing” the behaviour of another Christian – a guy was having sex with his stepmother! Paul is strong on this for obvious reasons and tells the church to “Expel the wicked person from among you.”  This was for a season and later Paul would write to them to welcome this man back into the fellowship. So the church was to assess this man’s behaviour as wrong (not condemn him), remove him from the church for a season (presumably he wasn’t repentant at the time) and later accept him back.  Restoration should always be the goal of church discipline (Galatians 6:12).

In 1 Corinthians 6:5-6, “Is it possible that there is nobody among you wise enough to judge a dispute between believers?” Paul uses a different Greek word, Diakrino meaning “to decide or discern.” Jesus uses the same word in John 7:24, “Stop judging by mere appearances, and make a right judgment” (or decision); James in Acts 15:19, “It is my judgment, therefore, that we should not make it difficult for the Gentiles who are turning to God.” Here judgment means “assessment.”  In Romans 12:3 Paul writes, “For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment” (here judgment means “opinion”).

We are to assess things according to the Word of God but we must not condemn people with the Word.  Christians need to learn to express God’s truth without being judgmental and condemning.  We can feel strongly about something but we must never be arrogant or lacking in compassion.  Read Luke 7:36-50 and you’ll see a classic example of Jesus challenging someone’s harsh, arrogant and compassionless judgment of a sinful woman.

Now let’s go back to Matthew 7:1-5 which is often quoted out of context.  Jesus instructs His people NOT to judge or condemn others and warns that if we do “in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.”  That’s worth bearing in mind! He then uses an analogy from His vocation as a carpenter, “Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye?”  Great questions!  Jesus goes on to define this sort of judgment as hypocritical and instructs us to “first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.”  In other words it’s okay to help someone else with his or her speck as long as we’ve dealt with our plank first!

Next time you’re tempted to be judgmental ask yourself:

  • What is my reason for wanting to correct or judge?
  • Is it for their benefit or to satisfy my pride and self-righteousness?
  • Am I more focused on condemning people than helping them?
  • Is love for them my motivating force? If people know we love them and have their best interests at heart they will be much more open to hearing our words.

Finally, remember that Jesus’ purpose in coming to earth was NOT to judge people.  He said, “I did not come to judge the world, but to save it” (John 12:47; 3:16-17; 8:15).  1 Corinthians 4:5 says, “… judge nothing before the appointed time; wait till the Lord comes.”  We would do well to heed that advice.  Some things just need to be left to the Day of Judgment when the judge of all the earth will do what is right.

There are over 100 references of the word “gospel” mentioned by several authors in the New Testament.  But it wasn’t a new word that they made up to describe what was accomplished and offered by Jesus.  It was a well-known word in classical Greek (euangelion) referring to a message of victory, or other political or personal news, that caused joy!  It was a word that was commonly used by people in the Roman Empire.

When Julius Caesar was assassinated on March 15, 44BC in the Theatre of Pompey, a period of political unrest followed.  The Roman Republic struggled for a time in civil war until Julius Caesar’s nephew Octavian (later called Augustus) took the throne in 31BC.  Caesar Augustus is the earliest figure of the Roman Empire mentioned in the New Testament as he was the emperor during the time of Jesus’ birth (Luke 2).

Caesar Augustus was called the “son of god” who was the great “Saviour” of the whole earth through bringing an end to civil war and ushering in the Pax Romana (200 years of “peace” to Rome).  The themes of freedom, justice, peace and salvation permeated his reign. Whenever the great deeds of Augustus were proclaimed, they were presented with the Greek term euangelion.  His deeds were celebrated with poems and inscriptions, coins and images, statues, altars and structures.

An imperial quote stated, “All the cities unanimously adopt the birthday of the divine Caesar as the new beginning of the year … the birthday of the god [Augustus] has been for the whole world the beginning of good news (euangelion) concerning him [therefore let a new era begin from his birth].”

Caesar is depicted as having been born, and therefore as human, but also in some mysterious way, he is also divine.  The poet Horace put it this way: “upon you [Augustus] however, while still among us, we already bestow honours, set up altars to swear by in our name, and confess that nothing like you will arise hereafter or has ever arisen before now” (Epistles 2.1.15-17)

So to summarise: Augustus was seen as a god in human form who ushered in a new era of peace. He was called the son of god and the Saviour. His birth changed the calendar and his deeds were celebrated as good news, or gospel, that brought joy to people.  In the midst of this, Jesus was born – the one referred to as the Saviour, the Son of God who would bring peace and good news that will cause great joy for all the people (see Luke 1:35; 2:10-14).

No wonder the introduction of the Christian faith brought such a clash of cultures that resulted in Rome persecuting Christians for the best part of 300 years.  Author Edward Gibbon put it this way: “By embracing the faith of the Gospel the Christians incurred the supposed guilt of an unnatural and unpardonable offence. They dissolved the sacred ties of custom and education, violated the religious institutions of their country, and presumptuously despised whatever their fathers had believed as true, or had reverenced as sacred.”

Throughout the centuries the radical teaching of grace and love by Jesus and His followers has continued to create a clash with the culture of the day – and life today is no different.  In this age of entitlement, the “like me” generation that is looking for its “best life” clashes severely with the teaching of Jesus to “love your neighbor as yourself.”  Emphasising only the internal aspects of the gospel has raised up a generation of selfish consumer-Christians who stop at Jesus being their “own personal Saviour,” while neglecting the fact that the gospel is not just something you experience – it’s something you live!  The gospel of Jesus is not just about “me” – it’s about “us” and it’s about “others.”

When Jesus began His ministry He did so by reading from the scroll of the prophet Isaiah in a synagogue on the Sabbath Day.  He presented the gospel – a message of victory that caused joy!  Jesus said, “The Spirit of the Lord is on me, because he has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor.  He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners and recovery of sight for the blind, to set the oppressed free, to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favour.”

Jesus taught that living the gospel message would mean that He and His people would bring:

  • Good news to the poor
  • Freedom for the prisoners
  • Sight for the blind
  • Freedom for the oppressed

He finished the reading by saying that the gospel was a proclamation of the year of the Lord’s favour.  Interestingly enough Jesus stopped reading halfway through a sentence.  The next line says, “and the day of vengeance of our God.”  Jesus announced that this was the time when God is willing to accept people.  The original word refers to an amnesty – a general pardon for offenses, often granted before any trial or conviction, as well as an act of forgiveness for, and the forgetting or overlooking of any past offense.  What wonderful news Jesus proclaimed for all people.  All of us who have been changed by the gospel are carriers of good news that should bring great joy to others.

Since becoming a Christian at the age of 19, I’ve always loved it when the church expresses its God-given unity. God loves it too!  In Psalm 133 He says, “How good and pleasant it is when God’s people live together in unity!” 

Unity here refers to harmony; the opposite is disarray, confusion and chaos.  I’ve been to churches like that – and workplaces and families. It’s not a pretty sight. But unity doesn’t equal uniformity. “Harmony” is a musical term that refers to different notes being played or sung together. When the right notes are heard together there is harmony and it sounds great. But when the wrong notes are played together you get discord and that sounds like nails scraping down a blackboard.  Unity doesn’t mean that we’re all the same it just means that we “play well together!”

The result of unity is always blessing (something that makes you happy, contented and joyful). The Psalmist says that unity “is like precious oil poured on the head … running down on Aaron’s beard, down on the collar of his robe.” Anointing with oil was common on festivals and joyous occasions. In Scripture oil has become a symbol of joy, abundance and fragrance. The abundance of aromatic oil would fill the whole atmosphere with a magnificent aroma. Unity in a church, a workplace or a family brings joy and smells great!

So unity is like oil and it’s also like dew: “It is as if the dew of Hermon were falling on Mount Zion.”  Mount Hermon is the highest point in Israel (over 2,200 metres above sea level). Mount Zion on the other hand is just a small hill. By implication a big mountain would naturally receive a larger amount of dew than a small hill, but “when God’s people live together in unity … it is as if the dew of Hermon were falling on Mount Zion.” The blessing outweighs the size; there is abundance.

It’s there in the place of unity that God bestows or commands His blessing; and it’s a command that will be carried out! You live under the commanded blessing of God when you live in unity with those around you. And so, “if it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.” (Rom 12:18).

Unity doesn’t mean that we all agree on everything. It doesn’t mean that we’re all the same. It means that we work through the issues, we choose to love each other despite our differences and we focus on the things we have in common: we are redeemed by the same Saviour; we serve the same Master; we cherish the same hope; we’re looking forward to the same heaven; we’re subject to the same trials, temptations, and sorrows; we have the same comfort and we’re focused in the same direction.

Unity was so important to Jesus that He prayed for the unity of His Church (John 13 and 17). But when we look around at much of the church today, it would be easy to get the idea that Jesus doesn’t always get His prayers answered. Christians in local congregations often have trouble getting along together; to say nothing of reaching across denominational, stylistic and doctrinal boundaries. How tragic this is when we consider the power of unity and love amongst believers:

“That the world may believe that you have sent me.” (John 17:21)

“To let the world know that you sent me and have loved them …” (John 17:23)

“All men will know that you are my disciples that you are my disciples if you love one another.” (John 13:35)

Christian unity is the single most powerful key in reaching people with the Good News of Jesus. The world around us is supposed to get an understanding of how much God loves them by looking at the way God’s people love one another. No wonder unity has been so ferociously attacked over the centuries; no wonder it’s so hard to encourage God’s people to gather in unity.

I am under no illusion that this blog will cause the whole church to suddenly unite in answer to Jesus’ prayer; but maybe some of this will be food for thought that will cause us to look again at the power of unity.

 

When you read the title of this blog what did you immediately think of? Probably gay marriage! But that’s not what this blog is about. I believe there is a greater threat to marriage– a threat that comes from within the church itself.

Over the past few years I have been amazed to see many Christian marriages fail:

I’ve seen a Christian leader leave his wife and kids.

Then there’s the two pastors – who’ve had longstanding addictions to Internet porn and marital unfaithfulness – decide to leave their wives, children and churches.

There’s the wife who just doesn’t want to be married anymore so she leaves her husband.

I know an evangelist in the USA who’s recently been married for the fifth time – and is still in ministry. She invited us to the wedding but we were unable to attend. I told her we’d try and make the next one.

Another well-known evangelist has recently been separated from his wife of 30 years – even though they had been living in different houses for quite some time. This abusive marriage is over but the evangelist is still in ministry of course; the show must go on!

A while ago I heard that the son of an Australia Church leader was getting remarried. This young man had left his first wife because they didn’t really love each other and just weren’t happy. I asked the pastor who was doing the wedding what he thought about the Scriptures concerning divorce and remarriage. He told me he wasn’t thinking about it too much. After all, they are friends and he didn’t want to let them down. “But didn’t Jesus say they would be committing adultery” I asked. I was told, “yes, but they’ll ask for God’s forgiveness and it’ll all be okay!” It’s just that simple!

And these examples are just the tip of the iceberg. Marriage certainly is under threat but the biggest threat is from within the church itself, and the church needs to sort itself out rather than just playing moral policeman to everyone else.

The words of Jesus ring true on this issue: “Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.”(Matthew 7:3, 5)

Of course I am aware that some marriages have no hope of surviving because of infidelity, abuse or someone just walking away; and my heart goes out to people who wanted their marriage to work but found themselves in a situation that was beyond their control. But what I’m addressing here is the undervaluing of marriage by some today who leave marriages because they’re “just not happy anymore.” Christian people who view marriage as a ten-year lease with an option to extend are a bigger threat to the holy institution of marriage than anyone or anything else.

Let’s be honest, while there are some good reasons for leaving a church, there are a lot more bad ones. As a pastor, I hear some of them every now and again. Here are five really bad reasons to leave a Church:

1. “I’m not being fed”

As a pastor with a teaching gift I take my job of feeding God’s people VERY seriously. But there are also lots of other things vying for my time: managing staff, meeting needs, putting out fires and developing leaders – all while overseeing the overall vision and direction of the church. Years ago a man in our church had a vision. He saw adults sitting in baby highchairs with a dummy in their mouth. God showed him that many Christians are like that – big babies who still cry every time they want someone else to feed them.

To leave a church because you’re not getting “enough” is a cop out. Your primary call in the church is to contribute, not just to consume. As a Christian, you shouldn’t require spoon-feeding for the rest of your life. Eventually you need to learn how to feed yourself so that, in time, you can actually feed others. Remember, your call is not just to be a disciple but also to make disciples (Matthew 28:19-20)

2. “It’s getting too big”

I can appreciate the sense of loss that accompanies growth. When Bayside Church began 22 years ago we were a small band of Christians who could all fit into one living room. It feels very different now that we are a large church spread across multiple services & sites. There are moments when I miss the intimacy and simplicity of those early days. But remaining small is a sad and unbiblical goal.

When churches are faithful to the Great Commission, lives will be changed and people will be added to their number. Growth is inevitable for faithful and healthy churches. If you have a problem with big churches, you really wouldn’t have liked the first church, and you definitely won’t like heaven.  Instead of seeing size as a negative, learn to appreciate all the variety and influence that a big church can achieve.

3. “I don’t agree with everything that is being preached”

Guess what? Neither do I and I’m the pastor. As such I fully reserve the right to disagree with myself. And every now and then I do exactly that, because I’m learning, growing & asking questions, and my hope is that you are doing the same. I trust the pulpit at Bayside Church to our team members & visiting ministries and I don’t always agree with everything that is said or the way they say it but, unless it is rank heresy, I just let it slide because we’re all learning and growing together.

Chances are you are not going to agree with everything that is preached anywhere. We need to learn to disagree on secondary issues.

4. “My Needs Aren’t Being Met”

People who use this as an excuse to leave a church have bought into the lie that, when it comes to church, it’s really all about “me.” Here’s the problem: the Church actually isn’t about you. It’s about Jesus. It’s His Church. He came for it. He died for it. He redeemed it. He continues to build it. And one day, He’ll come back for it. It’s His.

This is the same Jesus who came to seek and to save the lost and then commissioned his Church to go and do the same. The Church doesn’t just exist to meet your needs. You are a part of the Church that exists to meet the needs of the others. Put away the shopping trolley and pick up a shovel!

5. Unresolved Conflict

This is the number one reason people leave a church and of course wherever you find imperfect people you will find conflict. The Church is one big family full of characters and misfits. Sometimes sisters argue and brothers fight. But despite it all, family is supposed to be the place where you stick together even when it’s hard – especially when it’s hard.

Paul addressed a lot of church conflict in his letters. Nowhere do we hear him encouraging believers to bail on one another or move on down the road to a different church where it’ll be easier. Instead, much of his letters are his encouraging and coaching these ragamuffin communities in how to do this very hard and messy thing together.

One of the key aspects of the gospel is forgiveness and reconciliation. How will we ever demonstrate these things to the world if we don’t practice them ourselves?

Based on an article written by Aaron Loy in Relevant Magazine

A couple of weeks ago someone from our church posted a John Wimber quote on my Facebook page. Wimber wrote, “I’m concerned the Church has become more of a theatre experience, rather than a meeting place for people to encounter & interact with God. People don’t need more entertainment; they need to encounter the King.”

It’s a great quote, and I certainly agree with the sentiment of it, but I felt there was a reason this man posted the quote – a reason that was more than it being just a great quote. I asked him and I was right. He said he came across the quote when I was promoting our recent Good Friday service and it appeared to him that the service could perhaps contain entertainment.

All of this got me thinking about the question “Is it wrong for the church to entertain people?” Before I give my thoughts on this let me say that I agree with John Wimber in that entertainment is not the church’s purpose or goal.  He was observing a phenomena that was rising in his day when the church was becoming increasingly a “theatre” experience that was more seeker-sensitive than Spirit-sensitive. I believe the main reasons we are to gather are to encounter God, grow deeper in our relationship with Him as well as to strengthen our relationships with each other.

But is it wrong to entertain people in the process of achieving these goals? Are they mutually exclusive? If we entertain people do they not encounter God? Can people only encounter and interact with the King if they are not entertained?

For answers to these questions we need look no further than the way Jesus taught as well as the content of the Bible. The vast majority of Jesus’ teaching was in story form (Parables). Telling stories was the primary entertainment of the masses in Jesus’ time. After a long discourse (recorded in Mark 12) that contained stories, an amazing answer to religious leaders who were trying to trap Jesus, and then a blunt rebuke to one of the leading religious sects (the Sadducees) the people were enthralled.  Mark says, “The large crowd listened to him with delight” (Mark 12:37). Were they entertained? Absolutely! They were rapt. Their emotions were stirred. I can hear them whooping and cheering. Jesus entertained people and, while they were engaged, they encountered and interacted with God.

The Bible is full of language and writing that entertains people – there’s history, poetry, stories, drama, suspense, hyperbole, miracles, sinister plots (think Haman and Esther), proverbs, songs, fantasy, humor and a whole lot more. God could have given us a two-sided A4 page with “Things to do” on one side and “Things not to do” on the other, but instead He gave us a book that engages and entertains the imagination and enables us to encounter Him on every page.

Unfortunately many churches today see life in black and white and shades of grey. What a shame when the very nature of God in creation is so full of colour and entertainment that engages our senses. See the incredible variety of animals and plants, taste the amazing foods, smell the aromas of coffee & freshly baked bread, hear the sounds of birds singing their song, let sand run through your fingers on a warm day. God’s creation entertains and engages us and through it we can encounter Him. Should not the church gathering reflect these same qualities? I love encountering God in our church and all of the ingredients of our services make this possible.

In Jesus’ day people were entertained by stories. Today telling stories is still a big way of engaging people and communicating truth. In Today’s society however, we are blessed with technology. We can communicate, engage and yes, entertain people through film, social media, drama, dance, music, lights, pictures, artwork and so much more. In an age where the adult attention span has reduced to an average of six minutes I believe that entertaining people is even more important because if they tune out how will we communicate life-changing truth?

Is it wrong for the church to entertain people? Not at all!

One of the stories trending this week on Facebook concerns Fred Phelps, the founder of the highly controversial Westboro Baptist Church, who is said to be dying at a hospice center in Kansas.

The news originated from Nate Phelps one of Fred’s estranged children, who wrote this on Facebook a few days ago.

“I’ve learned that my father, Fred Phelps, Sr., pastor of the “God Hates Fags” Westboro Baptist Church, was ex-communicated from the “church” back in August of 2013. He is now on the edge of death at Midland Hospice house in Topeka, Kansas.”

The Westboro Baptist church was pioneered by Fred Phelps in Topeka, Kansas, in 1955. To this day the church remains small in numbers but big in impact because of its controversial statements and pickets – over 52,000 of them since the church began. Its websites include “God Hates Fags,” “God Hates America,” “God Hates Islam,” “Jews Killed Jesus,” and “Beast Obama.”  You get the idea. God’s pretty ticked off with just about everyone except the people at Westboro Baptist. There’s even a “God Hates the World” website which lists all the countries and why God particularly hates each one. The Westboro website includes a tally of the “people whom God has cast into hell since you loaded this page.”

The church has become particularly well known, and despised, for protesting at the funerals of high-profile people as well as American soldiers who’ve died in combat. A number of laws have been passed in order to keep these misguided “Christians” away from grieving friends and relatives.

As a Christian I have found the Westboro Baptist Church to be a great embarrassment over the years. I frequently find myself disappointed with their hate filled rants as well as all the media attention they receive. They present God in a way that only repels people away from a Creator who loves and cares for them. They will be remembered in history in the same category as those who misquoted the Bible to defend slavery (think “Twelve Years a Slave”), the subjugation of women, and the persecution of scientists.

So how should we respond to such a hateful man as Fred Phelps as his life draws to a conclusion? It would be easy to cheer and spew the same hate back at him that he and his family have dished out over the decades. After all, he’ll reap what he’s sown right? But does that reflect the teaching of Jesus? I think not. Jesus constantly encourages us to take the high road in our reactions towards those who mistreat us. He said, “Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you” (Matthew 5:44). In chapter 9 of his gospel, Luke recounts the story of a Samaritan village that rejected Jesus and His disciples. James and John asked Jesus, “Lord, do you want us to command fire to come down from heaven and consume them, just as Elijah did?” After all, God hates Samaritans!  Jesus “turned and rebuked them, and said, “You do not know what manner of spirit you are of. For the Son of Man did not come to destroy men’s lives but to save them.”

The apostle Paul picks up the Master’s teaching when writing to the Roman Christians, “Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse … do not repay anyone evil for evil … do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good” (Romans 12).

A friend of mine posted this on Facebook last night, “Can you imagine what a powerful statement it would be if the LGBT community showered the Phelps family with love during Fred Phelps’ funeral?”  I replied, “Well said, that would be awesome to see and hear – unexpected, unpredictable and a whole lot better than spewing hate back at hate.” This guy suggested a response that takes the high road – a response that Jesus encourages us to choose. Is it easy? No, it’s difficult. But the world will never be a better place if we only fight fire with fire. There’s got to come a time when we stop firing hate, bullets, bombs and harsh words at one another.  Fred Phelps will pass away and there’ll be plenty of hate-filled people to take his place. We can’t stop them, but we can choose the higher road of love that Jesus taught us to take.

Why are women allowed to speak in the church when the Bible says they should be quiet?  There are two passages of Scripture that teach this very clearly: 1 Corinthians 14:34-35 and 1 Timothy 2:11-12:

“Women should remain silent in the churches. They are not allowed to speak, but must be in submission, as the Law says. If they want to inquire about something, they should ask their own husbands at home; for it is disgraceful for a woman to speak in the church.”

“A woman should learn in quietness and full submission. I do not permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man; she must be silent.”

The word “silent” refers to “The quietness of the disciple who receives instruction.”   “To have authority over,” means, “to domineer or usurp/seize authority”.

On closer inspection of the context and culture of these verses, it becomes clear exactly what the apostle Paul was addressing.  The Corinthian church was out of control.  They were gripped with carnality, lawsuits, immorality and false teaching.  People were getting drunk during the Lord’s Supper and their church meetings were a mess with everyone competing for a chance to use the gifts of the Holy Spirit.  It’s with this in mind that the verses in 1 Corinthians are to be understood: “If they want to inquire about something, they should ask their own husbands at home.”  It seems that the women of the church were asking their husbands questions during the teaching of the Word and, this too, was disrupting the worship service.

The first letter of Paul to Timothy was written to prevent the spread of heresy in the church.  It appears that women were the main culprits of spreading the false teaching and so Paul temporarily prohibits them from teaching until they had been instructed in the Word thus correcting the error that was being taught.  Professor David Sholer puts it this way, “These injunctions are directed against women involved in false teaching, who have sought to abuse proper exercise of authority in the church, not denied by Paul elsewhere to women, by usurping and dominating the male leaders and teachers in the church at Ephesus”.

One of my lecturers in Bible College in the 80s, Spencer Gear, said, “1 Timothy 2:11-12 is not a command to prevent all women from teaching in the church at all times.  Paul’s intention was not to place a permanent limitation on women in the ministry. Rather, these verses were addressed to a problem situation in Ephesus where women were teaching heresy”.

The culture in which a church finds itself also has a large bearing on the matter.  Tony Campolo in his book “20 hot potatoes” says, “If the existence of women preachers created a barrier to non-Christians coming into faith, then it was right for women to refrain from being preachers.  In today’s world … keeping women out of pulpits is having a negative effect upon the propagation of the gospel throughout the outside world, and therefore the policy on the matter which was in place in the past should be set aside” (Pg.39).

If we were to take these passages literally today we would disqualify all women from any vocal ministry in the church.  That would include Sunday school teaching, youth leadership, speaking at women’s meetings, missionaries, singing in the church in any way, praying in prayer meetings and so on.  This would also contradict what Paul wrote a few chapters earlier in 1 Corinthians 11:5, “And every woman who prays or prophesies with her head uncovered dishonors her head-it is just as though her head were shaved.”  So, women ARE allowed to speak in the church then!  The “church” being wherever believers are gathered together.

If we were to take these passages literally for all situations we would also contradict the rest of the New Testament, which clearly permits women to minister.  Women ministers include: Anna the Prophetess (Luke 2:36), Dorcas (Acts 9:26), the woman of Samaria (John 4:7), the four daughters of Phillip (Acts 21:9), Priscilla (Acts 18:24-26), the older women (Titus 2:3-4), Phoebe (Rom 16:1, 2), Euodia and Syntyche (Phil 4:2,3), Tryphena and Tryphosa (Rom 16:12).

In general, the gifts of the Spirit, many of which are vocal gifts used in the church, are available to all believers regardless of gender (Rom 12:6-8; 1 Cor. 12:8-10; Eph. 4:11; Col. 3:16).  Acts 2 also makes it clear that God supports women in ministry: “In the last days, God says, I will pour out my Spirit on all people. 
Your sons and daughters will prophesy, your young men will see visions, your old men will dream dreams. Even on my servants, both men and women, I will pour out my Spirit in those days, and they will prophesy.”

John Stott says, “If God endows women with spiritual gifts (which He does), and thereby calls them to exercise their gifts for the common good (which He does), then the church must recognise God’s gifts and calling, must make appropriate spheres of service available to women, and should ordain (that is, commission and authorise) them to exercise their God-given ministry …”

Finally, if we were to take these passages in 1 Corinthians and 1 Timothy literally today we would nullify Christ’s work on the cross.  The Old Testament Temple was divided into three sections: The Holy of Holies where the High priest entered once a year.  The Holy Place – reserved for Jewish men only, and the outer court – for Jewish women and gentiles.  This all changed at the crucifixion when the veil that separated the Jewish men from the Jewish women and gentiles was torn from top to bottom (Luke 23:45).  The New Testament allows open fellowship of ALL people who come to God through Christ, whether male or female: “You are all sons of God through faith in Christ Jesus, for all of you who were baptised into Christ have clothed yourselves with Christ. There is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus” (Galatians 3:26-28)

I am so grateful to God for the incredible women that He has called into leadership at Bayside Church – not least my amazing wife, Christie.  The church community would be so much the poorer if we commanded them to remain silent ~ and I don’t like the chances of that happening anyway.

 

One "friend" didn't agree with me quoting a "secular" source and wrote, "Rob Buckingham, you have all the discernment of a lump of mud."  Nice hey?  I'm not easily offended and I chose not to be offended by this comment.  After all, Jesus healed at least two people by making mud out of dirt and spit, so maybe it was really a compliment – but I don't think so.

You see, the quote was taken from an article that Jeff Kennett wrote called "Australians must embrace gay marriage."  My Facebook "friend" took exception to this concluding that any article condoning gay marriage must be all wrong.  But I didn't quote the whole article, I just quoted one section in which I thought Jeff Kennett was spot on – his desire for a compassionate, uplifting and exciting church – as opposed to uncaring, dull and boring churches that are a major turnoff even to Australian Christians.  That's why, in the latest census, two thirds of Aussies describe themselves as Christian but only 7% regularly attend church.  The rest have probably been to a church and decided they have enough problems in life without adding a boring hour on a Sunday morning!

But my unkind Facebook "friend" is missing an important truth and buying into the lie that there is some great divide between the sacred and the secular.  The Hebrew worldview (from which the Bible is written) saw the earth as the Lord's and everything and everyone in it.  In fact the Bible writers often quote from "secular" sources.

The apostle Paul quotes from a number of ancient Greek poets in his writings.  In Acts 17:28 Paul gives two quotations: "'For in him we live and move and have our being.”  As some of your own poets have said, “We are his offspring.” The first quote is from the Cretan poet Epimenides (c. 600 BC), while “We are his offspring” is actually quoted by at least two different poets, Aratus (c. 315-240 BC) and Cleanthes (331-233 BC) in his Hymn to Zeus.  That's right, Paul quotes from a Hymn written to a pagan god and relates it to the worship of the One True God. 

We also find Paul quoting secular sources in two of his letters.  In 1Corinthians 15:33 he warns, "Do not be misled: “Bad company corrupts good character.” This is a quote from the comedy Thais written by Greek poet Menander.  In his letter to Titus, Paul quotes the Cretan poet Epimenides a second time, "Even one of their own prophets has said, ‘Cretans are always liars, evil brutes, lazy gluttons.’” Paul goes on in the next verse to say emphatically, "This testimony is true.  Therefore, rebuke them sharply so that they will be sound in the faith …" This quote is why calling someone a "Cretan" is considered an insult even today.

Jesus used well-known sayings of his day and brought them into his teachings.  In John 4 he uses two such sayings: "You know the saying, 'Four months between planting and harvest’” (v. 35).  Then in verse 37, "You know the saying, 'One plants and another harvests.’” And it's true."

Jesus also used stories from everyday life – things that his audience would be well acquainted with – and drew spiritual truth from them, to take people on a journey from what they knew to what they needed to know.  We would do well to find modern day parables that are applicable to life in the 21st Century.  And that's what I was attempting to do by quoting from Jeff Kennett's article: not trying to be as discerning as a lump of mud but rather trying to find a point of identification with people who may be looking for a relationship with God and a church that is compassionate, uplifting and, yes, maybe even exciting.

I just wanted to write… about why I came back to your church this time.  What was my motivation?  It was the search for pleasure.  That sounds like a funny reason to come back to church.  People come to church because they are looking for God, or out of a sense of duty or something like that. Not because they are looking for pleasure.  That is not supposed to be the reason why anyone comes to church.  But it was the reason why I came.

I was lying in bed one Sunday morning early three weeks ago and I was reflecting on my life and it came to me that there was no pleasure or enjoyment in my life.  I mean my life is very rich and full, but it seemed to me at that time that everything I did was just drudgery.  There was no joy in it.
 
And the question that arose in me demanding an answer was where was I to find joy and the answer that came to me was that I was to find it in your church.  I will not say this message came to me from God, because that sounds a bit pretentious, but I will say that it seemed to arise from the innermost depths of my being. It sort of floated up from the depths of my soul.
 
Anyway, that instinct, that uprising, that revelation, call it what you will, has proven to be a correct receiving because coming to your church has enlivened me.

I believe that this is the answer for attracting people to church.  People will come to church when they actually feel that this is the most enjoyable and valuable thing that they can be doing.  They will come to church when they feel that church is more entertaining than going to the pictures or watching TV.
 
Sometimes when I am in your church I feel that there is nothing more entertaining that I could be doing in all the world.  Entertaining may seem like a trivial word, but actually in its deepest sense I think it is quite meaningful.  I mean it in a meaningful way, not a trivial way.  I feel it is really entertaining to be in church. My feelings are stirred and uplifted and enlivened. I am constantly entertained by the worship and the music.  I feel profoundly entertained by events such as that children's day.  There is nothing more enjoyable or valuable that I could be doing.  It is more entertaining than being down at Southland (shopping centre) watching some trashy and ultimately unsatisfying and unnutritious movie. The food at this church is not only wholesome and nutritious but also colourful and tasty and that is what people want.

I couldn’t agree more.  The God of Scripture, of creation, of redemption is colourful, joyful and satisfying.  His church – His people – should be the same.

“You have made known to me the path of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand” (Psalm 16:11)

Church has changed – Check it out!